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| Reviewed by: Chris Burton 21 Oct 2008 Constantine
| |  did not enjoy Constantine. It is in the vein of super crappy satan films like Stigmata and End of Days. Keanu Reeves, one of the worst actors in Hollywood, is of course the star. He plays John Constantine. I think he's some sort of angel cast down to hell attempting to work his way back into heaven by killing a whole lot of demons.
Rachel Weisz, an excellent actress, does a good job but it is pointless in a film like this. She plays Angela Dodson. Angela's sister committed suicide apparently, but maybe Satan is involved. Angela enlists the help of John Constantine, the paranormal investigator(ghostbuster?). He challenges her atheism, and tells her that her sister went to hell because she committed suicide. So, they take a mystical journey to the fiery pits to visit her.
But there's a twist. Constantine has lung cancer. That means that he'll be going to hell. He's trying his best to work his way into god's good graces. So he has taken sides in the war between the half-angels and the half-demons. So Johnny Cakes goes on a half-demon killing spree. He makes alliances with witch-doctor types. He takes along his annoying little sidekick on the adventures. But will all this effort buy him a seat at God's dinner table? My dear reader, how could I possibly be the one to ruin the ending of such a classic film? You'll have to see for yourself, but I suggest you don't.
So, the forces of Satan come out to play for some more. Locusts, flying devil-things, and probably some other stuff but at this point I had stopped paying attention. Reeves plays the character like a surfer, or not, I just can't help but imagine him on a surfboard whenever I see him on the screen.
On the technical side, this crap-tastic movie is outstanding. It is presented and 2.35:1 widescreen and encoded at 1080p. It ranks up with the very best-looking Blu-rays out there. The resolution is perfect, the nighttime scenes pristine. The hell scenes look amazing. Every bit of detail is great. There is a good deal of three dimensionality to the images as well.
On the audio front, it is presented in Dolby Digital Plus 5.1. The surrounds are mind-blowing. The hd-dvd also features the in-movie experience, which basically consists of being able to play the features during the film, its like a 100 minute documentary during the film. I guess that would be really cool if the movie didn't suck. |
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Copyright (c) 2007 Rock Star Media Works, Inc. All rights reserved.
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