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| Reviewed by: Chris Burton 07 Apr 2008 One Missed Call
| |  Wow, another remake of a Japanese horror film that's exactly like The Ring except not nearly as good. And The Ring sucked anyway! None of these movies are scary. And this one is especially fucking horrible. Not since Saw 3 have I seen such a hilariously bad and non-frightening movie take itself so seriously in its attempt to scare you.
There's now a horror movie about ghosts traveling through cell phones. Want to witness the exorcism of a cell phone? Behold One Missed Call. The cell phone-jumping ghost plays by unique rules. Sometimes, it's a physical creature and attacks people like the ghost from The Ring. Other times, it causes fatal freak accidents like the ghost in Final Destination. Often, it finds victims by searching through the former victim's cell phone address book. It gives a few days notice by leaving a post-dated voicemail of the victim's voice right before death. The ghost is kind enough to leave red candies in the deceased's mouth, too.
If you're going to remake a film by Takashi Miike, may I suggest at least maintaining an R rating. I mean, the man is only responsible for the most absolutely violent films in all of movie history. He, I have an idea!. Let's remake Ichi the Killer with a G rating. The kids will love it!
Basically, this movie is absolutely beyond terrible in every possible way. Its not scary at all. Its truly horrible script exemplified by the truly horrible actors that inhabit the truly horrible roles is almost too much to behold. Avoid it at all costs. |
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Copyright (c) 2007 Rock Star Media Works, Inc. All rights reserved.
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